“So it is,” Pooh answered.
“Yes,” said Eeyore. “However,” he said, brightening up a little, “we haven’t had an earthquake lately.”
I think I had an epiphany yesterday.
I looked at Robin and said, “We’re bummers. We’ve become the people who are depressing to be around.”
It’s true. I understand if you want to run and hide when you see us coming. “Oh, jeez, here they come…” We’ve been on our way to full “bummerdom” for 13 months now. I think we’ve now arrived. We’re Scott and Robin Bummer. We can throw our wet blanket on any happy occasion.
I don’t want to rain on anyone’s parade. In fact, I try not to. There are so many things going great and I love to talk about them, but a lot of people keep poking the black cloud over our heads with lots of questions until the rain comes.
We’ve had sunny skies for a couple months. First came the news that I would receive my transplant in just 8 days. That was awesome, especially since it allowed me no time to freak out. Then came the surgery and recovery. Yeah my dark cloud worked hard to get back over my head during some pain episodes and a return visit to Lahey, but it couldn’t stay long. Black clouds are allergic to good reports.
A lot of you reading this blog have had the experience of going to work just as you have every day for years. Shortly after you arrived, or maybe last thing on a Friday, you got an announcement that things were changing. You made the drive to work secure in your job but then you made the drive home stunned. Plant closings, down-sizing, reorganization and your job evaporates right before your eyes. Your mind raced wondering where you could possibly find a new job “at my age” in this economy. What about benefits? What about insurance? It sucks, right?
Well, Scott and Robin Bummer had the unemployment or downsizing cloud move in overhead on Friday. With my medication running $3000-$5000 a month without insurance, our cloud pelted us with stinging hail. Robin’s job is changing drastically.
Monday, she meets with her boss to discuss transition. He has said he wants to keep her on part-time. We’re praying he will keep her at her present pay rate through the summer, with insurance and then, at half-time, keep her insurance intact.
We’re also praying that God provides Robin with a new job to either be full time or fill her remaining hours at her current pay rate. Let us know if someone is looking for an awesome office manager or personal assistant with computer skills, engineering office experience, licensing, shipping, book keeping and patent experience.
I’m still useless but am hoping to resume the real estate virtual tour portion of my photography business in a couple weeks to help contribute some. I’m praying God will give me the strength to shoot portraits beginning in August. Weddings and commercial photography by Spring? I read a stat that only 1 of 6 liver transplanted people are able to return to full time employment. I am determined to be that one! I know, I know. “Don’t push too hard.” But, I can still push, right?
My liver transplant will let me live. YAHOO! But my life will forever be different than it was. I will always have checkups, I will always take anti-rejection drugs, I will always be more susceptible to catching whatever is going around. Naps might remain impossible to avoid. BUT I AM ALIVE and that black cloud can’t change that!
We know our God has something good in store! We know this new challenge will be a new chance to grow closer. Maybe He’s going to give Robin a job where her mind can be challenged; a job she loves. I won’t be at all surprised if she finds a job where she makes more and has better benefits.
Our black cloud is set firmly above us again making it hard to feel the warmth of the Son (yes, Son – as in Jesus) but we know He’s there. We’ve got our faith umbrella up and are trying hard not to worry but my efforts are falling short right now. I’m worried but confident.
We don’t want to be Scott and Robin Bummer bringing pity and painful looks wherever we go. We’re tired of being the people who always are in crisis. I’m sure you’re tired of it too.
What do you say to this idea? If you don’t want me to rain on your parade, to spoil your picnic,to stop the dancing … don’t start poking my cloud after I tell you everything is great. Okay? Deal?
If you like a good thunderstorm, poke away!
Got a black cloud overhead?
I understand what you feel. I understand the weight you feel. Please don’t give up. This storm WILL move on. Storms move and do their damage but they eventually move out!
I will never forget the woman we met in New Orleans as we lent a hand after the devastation of Hurricane Katrina. She had waded through rising water to make it to the 4 story brick monastery at the end of her road. The nuns welcomed this 78 year old woman and one swam to get her life-jacketed 82 year old husband to safety. She said she looked out the third story window of the monastery that evening. She said “I saw the most calm, peaceful scene and the most beautiful sunset I have ever seen.” And then, “Sometimes God uses the storm to show us that He offers peace and beauty even in difficult times.”
She lost everything and could say that??? Yes. Her life convinced her that it was absolutely true.
Hang in there. Our black clouds WILL move and the warmth of the Son WILL shine bright.