Another dose of honesty?
I’ve never been this low before. I’ve never begged God just to take me before. Now I have.
My decline has been steady since March. I’ve read a billion encouraging notes and words. Now I just try to smile and say, “thank you.”
I’ve been anointed with oil while friends have prayed in faith. I have people praying for me around the world.
I’ve cried more tears than I thought possible. I’ve been unable to speak. I’ve wept in front of strangers and friends. I’ve wept with my wife and family. I’ve watched my mom and dad’s hearts breaking. I’m weeping now. I’ve tried to be strong but I am so very weak.
I’ve reached the point that I don’t have hope that I will recover but I do have Hope in my Jesus. I am looking forward to being with Him, pain-free, with my new body. I have been healed by His stripes and my future is secure. I am so tired I can’t even think about a transplant.
I am watching people I love suffer with me and I hate it. I would do anything I could to take their pain. Jesus loves me even more than I love them. For the first time I think I understand why He takes our suffering on Himself. Unspeakable love.
How I wish I could see others know that Love as followers of Jesus. I hope that desire will be my legacy.
Some of you will be angry reading this. I know. I’m sorry. Honesty.
I am healed of the sickness mankind carries. I am forgiven. I am secure with my Lord. This broken vessel of my body is not my home.
Thank you for praying for me. I do love you all and pray you’ll know my Jesus more and more.